>> jimmy: oh, man! that's what i'm talking about! that's a great crowd! thank you very much! welcome, you guys. welcome. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. happy tuesday. let's get right to the news. while he was in mississippi yesterday, president obama ate mini crab cakes, fried shrimp and shrimp salad sandwiches to show americans that seafood from the gulf coast is safe to eat. [ laughter ] and if you don't believe obama ate all that stuff, just ask our new president, joe biden. [ laughter ] yeah, he'll tell you. he'll tell you. president obama also ordered a lemon-lime snow cone on the beach. a little awkward. obama was like, "forget the oil spill for a minute. can we figure out how to fix the leaks in the bottom of these paper cone things?" [ laughter ] "i mean, come on, thing's have been around for fifty years. i still gotta -- i'm licking." [ laughter ] speaking of the oil spill, yesterday, bp ordered 32 oil-separating machines designed by kevin costner. [ cheers ]

yeah, costner said all along, a voice kept telling him -- [ whispery voice ] "if you build it" -- [ laughter ] "and there's a huge oil spill" -- [ laughter ] "and the oil company and government have absolutely no idea whatsoever how to clean it up -- they will come." [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] you gotta build this oil separating machine. have you guys heard this song yet? the situation has recorded his own rap song. [ audience groans ] called "the -- [ boos ] "boo" like "boo-yeah"? "boom" like "awesome"? uh, it's not bad, actually. i thought it was pretty clever the way he rhymed "abs" with "crabs." [ laughter ] i just thought that was clever. police here in new york are looking for a woman known as "the botox bandit." she's been passing bad checks in order to get spa treatment.

she probably won't be surprised when they catch her, but she will look surprised. [ laughter ] oh, man, a 5.7-magnitude earthquake struck southern california last night. yeah. it was so big, someone on the lakers other than kobe actually moved. [ laughter ] it was -- yeah. >> steve: no, you did not. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah. >> steve: no, you didn't. >> jimmy: i did. >> steve: you did it? >> jimmy: i did it. have you guys been watching the world cup? [ cheers ] yesterday, italy tied paraguay, 1-1. geez, this world cup has more ties than paula poundstone's closet. [ laughter ] when was that joke from? is that an old world cup joke? i think they read that when letterman was here. paula poundstone still wear ties? >> steve: yeah, why not? >> jimmy: i don't think so. hey, sad news, you guys.

sausage king jimmy dean has passed away at the age of 81. [ audience aws ] he will now be laid to rest in a casket linked to another casket, linked to another casket. [ laughter ] hey, listen to this. in a new interview, "twilight" star taylor lautner says that he'll only take his shirt off when there's reasons behind it. [ laughter ] yeah, for example, he takes his shirt off a lot in the next "twilight" movie but only because he was paid, like, 10 million reasons. [ laughter ] i was reading about this. a prison orchestra in the philippines gave its first public concert today. and you may be surprised to hear this, but it was terrible. [ laughter ] and finally, "glee" star lea michele will be starring in the 3-d movie musical "dorothy of oz." so if you love "glee" and you love "the wizard of oz," you should probably just go ahead and come out to your parents. [ laughter ] ladies and gentlemen, we have a great show. give it up for the roots! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

♪ >> jimmy: hey, all right. [ cheers and applause ] that was great. that was the roots. that was "walk alone" from the roots upcoming album, "how i got over." it comes out exactly a week from today, on june 22nd, next tuesday. [ cheers and applause ] the record is awesome. it's so good. got a lot of guest stars on the record. monsters of folk, joanna newsom, all those people. and, of course, you have the great roots, right there, the roots crew. questlove has returned. he was not here yesterday. [ cheers and applause ] how are you?

how are you feeling? [ mumbling ] >> questlove: i been doing just fine. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: quest got surgery on his teeth. yeah, and did everything go okay? >> questlove: yeah, everything's great. >> jimmy: okay, good. [ laughter ] are you on vicodin right now? >> questlove: yeah. [ laughter ] [ cheers ] >> jimmy: well, congrats on the record, guys. next tuesday, the album comes out. i know "dear god 2.0" is available right now on itunes. yeah, that's you and the monsters of folk, and that song is awesome. that's so, so good. next tuesday, baby. [ cheers and applause ] so excited. seven more days. hey, we got a great show tonight. always hilarious, i love this guy, cedric the entertainer is here! [ cheers and applause ] one of the funniest dudes ever. and speaking of the funniest dudes ever, also, fred willard will be joining us! [ cheers and applause ] and then, also, if you like great music, oh, my gosh. we have broken social scene here tonight! [ cheers and applause ]

they are phenomenal. i cannot wait. what a great show we're getting tonight. welcome back, quest. we missed you. ladies and gentlemen, it's time for "pros and cons." [ cheers and applause ] ♪ pros and cons and pros and cons and pros ♪ >> jimmy: this is where we take a look at the stories and issues making headlines today and weigh the good with the bad. tonight's topic, "watching the world cup." it's the biggest sporting event in the world, and it's happening right now. all right, let's take a look at the pros and cons. pro, espn will air 230 hours of live programming so you won't miss a thing. con, unless you are a goalie for england. [ laughter ] things might slip by in that case. pro, seeing the world cup is a once in a lifetime experience. con, so is seeing a goal scored. [ laughter ] it's true, it's like halley's comet. pro, it's a great excuse to get into soccer every four years.

con, it's a great excuse to get drunk at a bar at 6:00 in the morning. [ cheers and applause ] [ drunken slur ] "i just really like socket ball!" [ light laughter ] pro, you get to see a bunch of guys trying really hard but never scoring. [ laughter ] con, like me in college. [ laughter ] i don't want to talk about it. pro, david beckham says he believes england has a very good chance of winning the world cup this year. con, it sounded like this. [ british accent ] "i believe england has a very good chance of winning the world cup this year. and me and my wife, posh and -- cheerio. god bless, everyone." [ laughter ] pro, several players from team mexico have already received yellow cards and red cards. con, they were hoping to get green cards. [ laughter ] i don't think they give those out. [ cheers and applause ] i don't think they give those out. it's not a real thing. >> steve: does the guy pass those out, or how does that work?

>> jimmy: pro, in soccer you can't touch the ball with your hands. con, at home you can. [ laughter ] pro, if the u.s. isn't playing, you can always root for another country. con, that was a test. i.n.s. is on its way to pick you up right now. [ laughter ] that's how they get you. and finally, pro, england has developed a winning strategy to bounce back. con, signed lebron james. [ laughter ] there you go, everybody. that's "pros and cons." we'll be right back with some color commentary from the world cup. come on back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ male announcer ] you're surrounded by fabrics all day. ♪ wouldn't softer feel better? try ultra downy. it softens fibers better than detergent alone, for a deep-down softness. and ultra downy april fresh

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charlie:hat's how you do it son. vo: geico. 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. welcome back. well, like everybody else, like you guys, i have world cup fever, myself. i love it. i've been watching all the games. you guys watching all the games and loving it? [ cheers and applause ] it's so fun. something different. i'm really getting into it. but i -- it's really weird. people are staying up all night and getting up early to watch these games. one of the things i noticed that -- the american commentaries, they -- the ones i've seen, they aren't nearly as good at keeping you interested in the game as commentaries from other countries. maybe it's the time difference and they have to stay up late, or maybe they're just bored. i don't know. but they also -- they almost seem like they're starting to lose it. here, take a look at this clip.

[ vuvuzelas ] >> chip hensley here with dave squires, algeria and slovenia. [ yawns ] they're back in action. >> oh, there we go, guy kicks the ball. >> yep. >> and another midfielder kicks it. he's gonna -- the forward is gonna -- >> running. >> yep. >> he's kicking the ball back to another one. fullback dribbles there. >> you want a coffee or anything, chip? >> oh, i'd love another -- i'd love a coffee right now. anything, coffee, bag of coke, anything. i'm tired, man. [ laughter ] i've been up 30 straight hours. >> oh. >> what is that sound? what is that droning sound? giving me a headache. >> i believe those are the vuvuzelas. they're designed to keep americans from watching soccer. [ laughter ] >> oh, perfect. still a tie game, by the way. >> is it really? >> absolutely. >> i fell asleep for about six hours there. there we go. >> yep. >> did i ever tell you i married a slut? [ laughter ] >> you never told me that. but i can tell by the way you talk her. no a whole lot of respect there. >> very little respect at all. here we go, here's some action! guy going down the field, kicking the ball --

>> kicking the ball to another -- something actually is coming up. >> and he's gonna shoot it -- >> and -- >> no. >> no. [ laughter ] >> nothing happening again with the game. >> boom, there you go. >> hey, oh, man, i just remembered, i think i left the iron on at home. [ laughter ] >> you know, you should you call your wife one last time, man, and just check on her. >> i would call her. she left me, man. >> are you serious? >> i didn't tell you that? she left me for another man. she left me for a man named "manny." >> i thought your nanny was named manny. >> she was, but then she got a sex change and stole my wife. [ laughter ] >> so, manny was a nanny. now she's a tranny, and now she's hitting your wife's fanny? [ laughter ] that's crazy! >> if you are just tuning in, the score is still 0-0. >> apparently not with manny and your wife. >> well. [ laughter ] 1-0 manny, yeah. >> here we go! >> hey, do you remember kickball? >> now that's a sport i could get behind. >> hey, do you remember you got behind a guy named "sport"? >> yes, i do. [ laughter ] >> he did not like that. >> those were crazy times. he did not enjoy that at all. >> no. what year was that? >> that was 1969, oddly enough. [ laughter ] he got behind me. i got behind you --

>> i know, a lot of people -- brotherly love is what you're trying to say. >> no, free love back then. "fall into the gap." [ laughter ] >> people are getting -- >> here we go! here we go! here we -- no, never mind. never mind. >> i like that goalie there. he's kind of doing his own thing, wearing big mickey mouse gloves. >> you know, you gotta -- oh, look at that shirt. that's an attractive mauve. [ laughter ] >> it is a very attractive muave. >> "mauve," i think they call it. >> is that what they call it? >> is that bea arthur's show? [ light laughter ] >> lady godiva -- >> but he gets to wear, like, big gloves, mickey mouse -- he's kind of doing his own thing. i like -- >> speaking of doing your own thing, are you wearing a woman's cologne? >> i am. it's not a woman's cologne. it's more of a unisex cologne. >> it is sexual? >> no. it's called "bergeron." >> "bergeron"? [ laughter ] >> by tom bergeron. >> tom bergeron. >> he designed the cologne. >> that are must be a spicy, spicy cologne. >> you just never know what you're gonna get, and you could get kicked in the balls. [ laughter ] speaking of getting kicked in the balls, this game is still going on and -- [ laughter ] >> oh. >> hey, can we call a time out in this game? how's this work? >> never mind. >> all right, well, it's about time to go to commercial. before we do, let's say our darkest secret on the count of three. one, two, three.

>> i love racists. >> i slept with your slutty wife. all right, we'll be right back with more world cup action, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it just ain't the same anymore. we'll be right back with cedric the entertainer, everybody. come right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ 3q your legs are ready

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♪ [ applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. our first guest is a very talented actor and hilarious comedian who has starred in such hits as "barbershop," "madagascar" and "the original kings of comedy." his new special "cedric the entertainer's urban circus" airs wednesday, june 23rd, on tbs. give it up for cedric the entertainer! ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

>> audience member: cedric! >> jimmy: cedric, so good to see you. >> a gang of entertainers here. >> jimmy: yeah, absolutely. >> all my friends. doug. >> jimmy: everybody -- all my friends. everyone, yeah -- doug came out. [ cheers and applause ] i'm so psyched to have you on. i was doing research. i saw that you were almost not -- you were almost cedric the anchorman. >> yeah, yeah, i went to college first of all. >> jimmy: yeah. >> yeah, get that out of the way. >> jimmy: get that out of the way. where did you go to school? >> southeastern missouri state university. it was a state university as opposed to a penitentiary and -- [ laughter ] but i was -- i studied radio and television broadcast, and i had a job at a cbs affiliate.

>> jimmy: yeah. >> and -- but i never went to work, jimmy. it was the first recession. the recession back in the day. the old -- the old '81 recession. the '86 recession. the great '87 recession. >> jimmy: four, five, seven. >> yeah, the '89 recession. >> jimmy: '89 recession. >> terrible times. it was -- [ talking over each other ] >> jimmy: people were in the '91, looking at a '90, saying it that was awful. >> in which '93 is the recession. >> jimmy: yeah -- the recession. >> it was terrible. >> jimmy: i remember seeing signs. '94 recession. >> yeah, '94 was horrible. >> jimmy: the worst recession ever. >> and there was a lot of people, and they didn't have jobs. it was '96! >> jimmy: '96 -- yeah, yeah, yeah. [ light laughter ] >> tough times. tough times. >> jimmy: it was really, really, rough. i'll never forget it. >> yeah, i would have been a news guy. it would have been awesome. i'd have been like, "and that's our world. i'm cedric the news anchor." [ laughter ] 'cause i would have been a "the." i wouldn't -- i wouldn't give up my "the" no matter what i was doing. >> jimmy: you would not give up the "the." no. >> i'm gonna be a "the," whatever it would be. >> jimmy: you were not in st. louis at the time, right? this was -- >> this was cape girardeau,

missouri. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> yeah. we can -- i don't even know if it's on google. [ laughter ] i don't know if you can google -- >> jimmy: you think satellites don't even go there? >> yeah, you have to say a place goes to it, and then you google it from there. not an easy place to get to, but it was a good college. good college town. >> jimmy: 'cause you grew up in st. louis. >> yeah. >> jimmy: yeah, st. louis. that's a beautiful place. >> it's a good town. >> jimmy: i was just out there. super fun. i had a great time. >> we have the arch. >> jimmy: yeah! >> and white castles. [ light laughter ] i mean, i play that like nobody else has white castles. but in st. louis, it's so personal to us. >> jimmy: yeah, we have white castles here in new york. >> i know. but it's new york white castles. it's not our same white castles. >> jimmy: different, yeah. yeah, it's still -- yeah, it's pretty scary here. do you have family in st. louis? >> yes, i still have a lot of relatives there. >> jimmy: do they -- do you visit them? >> i'll visit them. that's what i usually do, i go to them. they don't come over. you know? [ light laughter ] i tried to have -- i tried -- i lived in a house where people can just come over, and they would just stop by, and

relatives would just come by. and you look up, and, you know, be in your parking space. your cousin be parked in your car -- so, i live behind three gates now. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you had a third gate put up? >> a guard gate, and then use another gate you go through with a clicker. and then there's a gate where it's like in the bahamas where a guy stands there with a wooden stick. [ laughter ] that's not going to do. [ talking over each other ] >> jimmy: i'm in a humvee. yeah -- the car is probably going to win. >> exactly. i used to watch manics. >> jimmy: we have a little something in common. you're going to the white house -- >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: fourth of july. >> going to do the fourth of july celebration for the troops. >> jimmy: yeah. >> nice. >> jimmy: it's really good. >> i have been to the white house before, though. i took my family there last year, and we went on the white house tour. now, you know, they took me on a tour. you know the one -- you know, you go and you sit in the

lincoln room and you see where jefferson -- i was like, "dude, i don't want to see this. i want to see barack's sock drawer." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's not on the tour? >> yeah, you know -- is he use mayonnaise or miracle whip type dude? you know? [ laughter ] i need to know some stuff. you know, like, when the tv, when he falls asleep, is it on b.e.t.? like, what does he watch. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what does he watch? >> like, what does barack watch when he naps out? is it "what chilli wants?" does he need to know -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: "what chilli wants." yeah, yeah. yeah, he probably has it up. [ imitating obama ] "i have it on tivo." when i went last year, it was me and foo fighters. i went and it was really fun. at the -- the white house thing on the fourth of july. except i wore a suit. because -- >> oh. on the fourth of july? >> jimmy: fourth of july. i made a mistake. but i nervous because i was meeting the president and the first lady, so i got dressed up. i get there, and the foo fighters -- i was opening up for them. they show up, they're in surf

shorts, t-shirts. >> yeah. well, that's the foo fighters -- they're a band. they can do that. >> jimmy: that's what i said. so, i go, "okay, so that's cool." and then i go meet them. and you meet the president and the first lady. i'm, like, so nervous. like, "what do i say to the first lady?" and i googled it. >> right. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: they said miss first lady. i was very nervous. so i walk in. they both start laughing hysterically at me -- >> because you were suited up? >> jimmy: i'm in a suit and i'm totally sweating. [ laughter ] >> i wouldn't think you would want to meet the president in flip flops. you know -- >> jimmy: that's what i thought. >> ashy. what if you ashy? >> jimmy: he goes, "didn't you" -- >> "hey, mr. president, got any lotion?" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he was asking for some lotion -- get all lotioned up. >> some barack-a-dermis. >> jimmy: barack-a-dermis. but that's the fourth of july. another thing we have in common, you just finished a move we tom hanks. >> yes. he's cool. >> jimmy: he's the coolest dude. [ cheers and applause ] i love him. >> he directed this movie. >> jimmy: he's a director. >> yeah, he directed this movie. he has a very cool thing whenever he shoots a shot. he goes, "what's wrong with that?" i love that. "what's wrong with that?"

>> jimmy: instead of cut? >> "it's good." yeah. he'll go, "that's it? good. what's wrong with that? let's move on." >> jimmy: that's great. >> tom hanks! he was twittering the whole time. i had to get on twitter because of that. i was like, i felt really behind. >> jimmy: i didn't know he was on twitter. >> yeah, he twitters. like, tom hanks is sitting there twittering. he's directing, twittering, facebooking. i mean -- you can't get anything done with people nowadays. 'cause they like, you know, like, i could twitter right now while i'm talking to you. i'll be like, "i'm twittering. i'm on 'jimmy fallon.' i'm twittering." whack. >> jimmy: what are you on on twitter? are you by your name? at your name? >> yeah, i'm @cedentertainer. take out the "the." >> jimmy: yeah, just save the typing. >> you know, a lot of people try to use the "the," and you get a big thing with people and their "thes." [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: 'cause they don't count the word "the"? >> right, yeah. and then got an extra space.

and then, you know how you can't as much stuff as you want to say, you know? so, i just cut it. i kept entertainer, the long word. it's got the most letters. >> jimmy: yeah. well, cedric the entertainer, you are going to do this thing with just for laughs chicago. >> yeah. >> jimmy: thanks for coming over to our show. because i know you got to go right from here to chicago. tape it, and then it's going to air next wednesday. >> yes, that's fast, right? >> jimmy: that's super fast. >> it's a new world. you know, you get a show on, shoot it friday, they edit right now on the ipads. they're doing it right there. [ laughter ] it's a app. >> jimmy: there's an app for that? >> yeah, show in and out. [ talking over each other ] you know, they got all kinds of apps. i've been trying to introduce apps, like hood apps. you want to know where to buy weed? that's an app for that. [ laughter ] if you don't know if your outfit matches, there is an app for that. >> jimmy: you don't know if your outfit matches. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you take a picture of it. >> like, "do this go together?" "uh, no." >> jimmy: but you got some good people on this thing, a good show. >> a very cool show.

jb smoove, sommore, russell peters and jerry seinfeld is going to stop by. my good friend. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: seinfeld's doing stand-up? >> my good friend. no, he's just going to stop by. he is not doing any stand-up. we didn't have that kind of cash. [ laughter ] this is strictly a "stop-byer." [ laughter ] you stop by. >> jimmy: "i'm gonna stop by. that's okay. i can stop by. we all stop by! i'll wave hello." [ cheers and applause ] stopping by. >> maybe you can do stand-up as jerry seinfeld. >> jimmy: just move his mouth up and down. i'll be like, "what's the deal with this?" [ laughter ] but it's the "urban circus"? >> the urban circus. >> jimmy: now, why are you calling it the "urban circus"? >> well, because i'm also going to introduce, like, some cool stuff from when i grew up, like, you know, things that happened in the hood, you know. people tumbling out on the street, doing flips on old mattresses, you know. so, we got that cool thing. i call it ghetto gymnastics. >> jimmy: i cannot wait.

i want to see that. it's going to be good. cedric the entertainer, "urban circus" airs wednesday, june 23rd, this wednesday. [ cheers and applause ] 10:00 p.m. on cbs. more with cedric the entertainer when we come back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ male announcer ] this is steven, a busy man. his day starts with his arthritis pain. that's breakfast with two pills. the morning is over, it's time for two more pills. the day marches on, back to more pills. and when he's finally home... but hang on -- just two aleve can keep arthritis pain away all day with fewer pills than tylenol. this is steven, who chose aleve and fewer pills for a day free of pain. and get the all day pain relief of aleve in liquid gels. its new formula is enriched with essential oils and it effectively removes hair, leaving your skin touchably smooth with a delicate rose scent.

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♪ >> jimmy: we're back with the great cedric the entertainer, everybody. i love -- now, cedric the entertainer, how did you come up with that nickname? >> that -- that was -- that was a crazy name. and actually, i started doing comedy, like, back in, you know, the 90s. and -- >> jimmy: using your full name? >> yeah, i was like -- i was -- i had a government name. i went out. and so -- google it. >> jimmy: google it. >> but, you know, i was performing, and i got very

popular in st. louis. and the guy was like, you know, "this next comedian." he kept calling me, "this next comedian." i only had five minutes worth of jokes. but i would sing, i would do poetry, i would do anything to fill up the 30-minute time slot so i could get the 30-minute money. >> jimmy: oh, totally. oh, yeah. >> i wanted the 30-minute money. >> jimmy: it's tough to get 30 minutes. >> yeah, you want 30-minute money, you know, when you start. 'cause that's how you are paid in comedy. you have 8, 5 -- 5 to 8 minutes, 30 minutes and an hour. so i wanted the 30-minute money. so, i told the guy to call me entertainer. i would sing. and so he did it one night. he was like, "well, this next guy is an entertainer, cedric the entertainer." and i did a great show, and it rocked. and when i left the stage, he called me cedric the entertainer again, and it stuck. and that was my name. so, that was it. >> jimmy: that's it. that's it. you're cedric the entertainer. >> i don't even know who the guy is. >> jimmy: if the guy is watching tonight -- >> you are the guy. if you are watching tonight, you are the guy who named me -- my name, guy. you are a good guy for that. >> jimmy: thank you, guy. his name is guy. >> yes, guy. we love you, guy. i think it's part of that great recession.

>> jimmy: it was awful. [ light laughter ] but i mean, to be an entertainer, you have to dance and sing like that. i know you're funny. >> yes. >> jimmy: you already got that. but i've never seen you dance. >> what! yes, i can dance, man. [ cheers and applause ] you want this!? >> jimmy: show me. show me a little something. >> i got moves. i got -- i got moves, man. >> jimmy: you got some moves? >> yeah. >> jimmy: all right. >> yeah, go on. let me -- ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] [ light laughter ] [ cheers ]

>> jimmy: you can dance. you have good dance moves there. that's so much better than me. [ light laughter ] no, but i might take this one. [ laughter ] that one's pretty good. i might take that one next time i go dancing. how about the singing? i've never heard you sing. >> oh, of course, jimmy, i can sing. you know, i got a little something for you. i got a classic. >> jimmy: it's a classic? >> it's a classic. it's a youtube -- not quite on youtube yet classic. [ laughter ] it's about when a man -- his only thing, his pride and joy is the remote control. [ laughter ] he don't want anybody to touch it. and when he can't find it, it's a problem. hit it! ♪ >> it goes like this here. ♪ i came home at half past five worked all day so you know i'm tired ♪ ♪ asked my wife

baby, what's for dinner? ♪ ♪ she said pork chops and rice sounds like we got a winner ♪ ♪ i turned on the tv to watch the evening news i can't change the channel you see i got an excuse ♪ ♪ where the remote? ah! where the remote? somebody tell me ♪ ♪ where the remote? yeah! where the remote? ♪ >> second verse. there's two verses. ♪ i ask my son put the tv on five he was complaining said daddy, i was outside ♪ ♪ i don't care if you was on the porch change the damn channel or help me find the remote ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ where the remote? ah! where the remote?

somebody tell me ♪ ♪ where the remote? yeah! where the remote? ♪ >> jimmy: cedric will be performing in orlando june 25th and in tampa bay on june 26th. cedric the entertainer, everybody! fred willard joins us next. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ boss: hey, those gecko ringtones you put on our website are wonderful. people love 'em! gecko: yeah, thank you sir. turned out nice. boss: got another one for you. anncr: at geico.com, it's easy to get a free rate quote, manage your policy, make payments or even file a claim! boss: now that's a ringtone. gecko: uh yeah...it's interesting.... certainly not the worst ringtone i've ever heard... ♪ ringtone lyrics: a-ringedy- ding-ding-dingy-dong, ringedy-dong-ding-ding... ♪ gecko (to himself): yeah, that might be the worst. anncr: geico. 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance.

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. you know our next guest from his hilarious work in tons of shows and movies, including "waiting for guffman," "anchorman" and "best in show." his latest film, "youth in revolt," is out on dvd today. ladies and gentlemen, please welcome fred willard! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ midnight at the oasis put the camel to bed shadows painting their faces ♪

>> i thought i'd make it an all-singing, all-dancing show, and i'm so embarrassed. i'm getting a tweet just as i'm about to come on. "did you know you're on 'jimmy fallon' tonight?" yes, i do know. >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. that is unbelievable. you're getting a tweet -- >> "say hello to cedric, though." you got fans. it's so superfluous, this whole thing. >> jimmy: it really is superfluous. do you know cedric the entertainer? >> cedric: yes, yes. well, you just got back from europe. you were in -- >> yeah, man -- we were in berlin, and for some reason, i'm not an opera fan, but i said to my wife, "let's go." they were doing a seduction -- or "abduction from the seraglio." [ laughter ] "abduction from the seraglio" by mozart. so we went to the went to the opera. now, berlin is very modern. they're about ten years ahead of us as far as entertainment. we went, and the tenor, the lead singer, i'm not kidding, was absolutely naked for 15 to 20 minutes. [ laughter ] he came out, he sang the entire aria, not a stitch of clothing on.

and -- [ laughter ] you know, it made me think, "why do i check" -- you know, you check your zipper just before you come on stage. why do that? but he was entirely naked. now, it upset me because, as an actor, when i watch other actors on stage, even if they're doing a different language, i watch how they move and, "oh, that's a nice thing. i might do that some time." but as a guy, you know where your eyes are going. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. >> you can't help but notice. and i think women react to nudity different than men do. you know, if you're a man and you see a woman with a kind of short skirt, she kind of crosses her legs, you know, you don't want to go, "woo-ooh!" [ laughter ] you try to be a little subtle. >> jimmy: but yeah, if you go like the locker room or the men's -- the gym -- i don't like that when guys are just walking around naked and -- it's awkward. >> if a woman sees a man with loose shorts and -- it's usually, "i don't want to see this." so, it's a different reaction. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, no, it's not -- it's not a good move. >> no. >> jimmy: no, i'm still stunned

by seeing my mailman naked. and i go -- [ laughter ] that wasn't even at the gym. >> hot weather, no. we're expecting a heat wave, so expect more of that too. [ laughter ] oh, the summer months in new york are terrible. more special delivery. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: now, you are super busy now. you are on "modern family." you did a little part in "castle." >> yes, in "castle" i was -- i ended up, i was the murderer in this tv show. i was the co-host of a late night talk show host. why would anyone want to murder the host of a late night talk show? i don't know. but i -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: people have reasons. >> plus, the challenge there is not to give it away that you are the murderer. so, you don't want to be too cool. you don't want to be too suspicious. so, i take it as a compliment if my friends say, "i did not know you were the murderer." >> jimmy: you gotta watch 'cause he's just -- >> i kill, but in good reason.

they're not pressing charges. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well, cedric, no, no. he's just acting. he's just acting. >> cedric: oh, it's just for the show? >> i am capable of it. no. >> jimmy: so, you were the sidekick on a late night talk show? >> yes, yes. >> jimmy: you have experience in that, because "fernwood 2 night." >> "fernwood 2 night," yes. >> jimmy: and then, alan thicke had a show, "thicke of the night." >> yes, yes, i was. >> jimmy: and you were the sidekick on that. >> i was. >> how do you know alan thicke? >> alan was the producer of "fernwood 2 night," years ago. people don't know that he's canadian. and he has at his house -- he has a canadian thanksgiving party, and he invited us there. and he runs in a fast crowd. barry bonds was at the party. and i'm a big baseball fan, so i was thrilled. and what do you say to barry bonds? "oh, hi, nice to meet you." so, alan's son, robin, is a big star. and at one point, they said "robin is going to sing his latest song. everyone come in the living room."

so i was went in, and i was watching robin thicke for about ten minutes. and i come back, my wife is sitting with barry bonds. [ laughter ] a long conversation about wrapping christmas presents or something. [ laughter ] i missed out on this. i could have been talking to barry bonds. what does it feel like that to stand up there? >> jimmy: oh, my god, yeah. you didn't get a chance? >> i, well, i -- what do you say to him that he hasn't heard a million times? >> jimmy: well, i don't know. you must have met a bunch of ball players. >> uh, yeah, well, i m a big fan. i'm always a little bit intimidated. >> jimmy: are you a fan of just one team or just, in general, baseball? >> well, baseball. and i love to follow the rookies that come up and the different players. and it made me think because, talking about the nudity in the opera -- [ laughter ] i have great admiration, when you wonder how two men -- in "youth in revolt," i had to be in a truck with michael cera and another guy, and it looks like we're naked in the truck. >> jimmy: yeah. >> we are not. i think i might have had a

problem with that. you have great admiration for these adult films where there's two men and one woman because -- [ laughter ] if it's you with another guy, i don't know about you, but with another guy -- you know, men are competitive. [ laughter ] "hey, come on, i have the right of way here. you got my spot!" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: right of way. >> plus, it's a known fact, i read this, if two men are in a situation and they're not familiar with each other, they go to a conversation about sports. you know, sort of, "hey, have you been to yankee stadium? it's a nice ballpark out there." "yeah, what about what about these washington nationals? they're recruiting some great players there." and meanwhile, the director's saying, "guys, can we get this action going?" [ laughter ] "jd, what's the name of that pitcher the nationals just signed?" "oh, yeah, he struck out" -- and then the lights and the poor actress is there. >> jimmy: you were not -- so, you were not naked in this?

but it just looks like it was. >> no, we had trousers on. it just gave the appearance. >> jimmy: you were very, very funny in this movie, as always. when are you not funny? the great fred willard. yeah, absolutely. fred willard. [ cheers and applause ] "youth in revolt" is out on dvd today. broken social scene perform next. come on back! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ fact: life today calls for more than an ordinary wipe. that's why there's lysol dual action disinfecting wipes. they go beyond ordinary wipes for a complete clean. because they have two different sides. a scrubbing side with powerful built in fibers that easily lifts tough messes and a wiping side that cleans and kills 99.9% of germs. try lysol dual action disinfecting wipes. twice the wipe for the same price. lysol. disinfect to protect. continues to be a very special beer. six weeks after jim started the business it took the best beer in america award.

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. our next guests are a beloved canadian band. they're here tonight to perform the song "texaco bitches" from their latest album, "forgiveness rock record." please welcome broken social scene! [ cheers and applause ] ♪

♪ texaco bitches have you begun again? texaco bitches i think you found a friend ♪ ♪ texaco bitches the guns beneath the youth ♪ ♪ texaco bitches this story needs some truth ♪ ♪ i wanna be fair ♪ texaco bitches, this town is going down texaco bitches, i hope you stick around ♪

♪ texaco bitches, the guns beneath the youth texaco bitches, i think we got the truth ♪ ♪ i wanna be fair ♪ i wanna be fair ♪ i wanna be fair ♪ i wanna be fair ♪

♪ ♪ texaco bitches, the light is coming in texaco bitches, i think we're bound to win ♪ ♪ texaco bitches, my weapon is my truce texaco bitches, i do not like to lose ♪ ♪ i wanna be fair ♪ i wanna be fair ♪ i wanna be fair ♪ i wanna be fair

♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, brothers. broken social scene. check out their album, "forgiveness rock record." broken social scene. see them live saturday in toronto. my thanks to cedric the entertainer, fred willard, broken social scene and the greatest band in late night, the roots. stay turned for carson daly. broken social scene is gonna play us out with another song from the new album. take it away, guys. go for it. [ cheers and applause ]

♪ ♪ ♪